thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Randomize
