I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Randomize
