let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
We talked him into tasing himself.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize