Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize