Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize
