$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize