Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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