I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Randomize
