OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize
