All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
