I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
