Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
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