bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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