he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
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