oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
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