If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Randomize