i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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