I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Randomize
