it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
3 2 1 whiskey
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Randomize
