If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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