is your mom at the bar?
Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize