I wish i was in the wii world.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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