he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
