I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
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