But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
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