As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
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