WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
