I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
