What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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