She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I will be naked everywhere
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
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