if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
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