I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
