rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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