We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
