We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
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