i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
