So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Randomize