In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize