If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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