Your dad touched me again.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
