Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize
