What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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