This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
