I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told grandpa to call you daddy
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
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