I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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