nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Randomize