Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Randomize
