he wants to bone in the snuggie
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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