Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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