I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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