i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
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we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
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I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.