Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
